How do you bounce back from a major disappointment?

Cindy Jobs Health and Well-Being

October is ADHD Awareness Month. Throughout the month, I will be sharing resources, tips, strategies, and success stories.

This week, let’s look at the process and success, of sorts.

A client of mine had the opportunity to challenge a college course, saving time, energy, and resources if they were successful. 

Unfortunately, they did not pass the challenge. What happened?

They were angry. 

They were disappointed.

They vented a lot.

I could see the stress and anxiousness written all over their face when we met. The client was devastated.

Then I asked my client to do three things:

  • Embrace the emotion.
  • Own the process.
  • Put the experience in perspective.

Embrace the emotion: It’s honest to feel and name all the feelings they were feeling. Trying to ignore them only makes it worse. I encouraged this client to wallow for a bit if that’s what they wanted to do, but then use those emotions to propel themselves forward. Years ago, I remembered my coaching mentor, saying, “there is motivation in emotion.” Yes, yes, there is!

Own it: The exciting thing about this experience was that the client did everything they’d intended to do in preparation for the exam. They’d done the studying they planned, got a good night’s sleep the night before, exercised the morning before the exam, and they ate a healthy breakfast. They executed their plans but still came up a bit short. Or did they? Yes, they hadn’t passed the challenge, but they HAD executed their plan, and therein lies a considerable success.

Put it in perspective: What does not passing this challenge mean in the scheme of things? Yes, it was a significant disappointment, and it’s going to take some time and resources to retake the course, but in the scheme of things, this is a little bump in the road.

In this example, the silver lining is that they will become a stronger, smarter, and more resilient person than they were before this experience.

What can you learn from the disappointments, large or small, that you encounter? How do you bounce back?

 

 

Cindy Jobs

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