Clients come to ADHD coaching for any number of reasons. A common thread is not activating on what they KNOW will help them achieve their goals.
In this scenario, both the mindset and strategies needed to be adjusted.
The stated goal: “I want to write more.”
Drill down: This client’s limiting belief was that writing was a hobby, and they should only partake in a hobby when they “were done with everything else” (when are we EVER done with everything?). Because of this, their writing took a back seat to many things, including their health and further their career. Also, the goal was a bit fuzzy. What does “write more” mean?
What was currently standing in the way?:
- Although they visualized themselves as “a writer,” they believed the act of writing was a hobby, not a job.
- They didn’t have the perfect time or place to write.
- They were simultaneously concerned about the writing being well-received and not being well-received. What would happen next? If they didn’t finish the writing project, no next steps were necessary.
What was possible?:
- Becoming a writer.
- Strategy: After much soul-searching and awareness, the client realized that until they set themselves up as a writer with the necessary resources, time dedication, and writing goals, they would never move past writing as a hobby. Visualizing themselves as a writer wasn’t enough; they needed to create writers’ habits.
- Finding the perfect time and place.
- Strategy: The first thing the client did was determine that “write more” meant two hours per day. They experimented with writing at home and in public places. They experimented writing at different times of the day. They experimented with writing on paper and a computer. Ultimately, the best tactic was to write 6:00 – 8:00 PM, on their computer, at a local coffee shop.
- Was their writing good?
- Strategy: The client spent a lot of time worrying about “what’s next?” If the writing was received poorly, did that mean they weren’t “a writer” as they’d imagined themselves? Conversely, if the writing was received well, what did that mean? Eventually, the client determined that they were spending so much time worrying about the outcome of their writing that they had no energy left to write. They shifted their mindset from writing for others to writing for themselves, and the floodgates opened.
What was their goal?: “I want to write more.”
As generally happens, creating the appropriate mindset and strategies around intentions is essential. Identifying who we want to become (a writer) is the first step.
Cindy Jobs
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